is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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