I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
