There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Randomize
