he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
