i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Nobody cheats on THIS.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
