i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize