Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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