Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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