girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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