after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
