Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
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he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
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They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.