writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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