He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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