i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
