Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
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