you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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