this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
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