I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
