Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
