Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
