And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
