I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i just sent this text using only my big toe
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
