he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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