wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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