Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
