Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
