her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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