do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Randomize
