grandma shit on top of the toilet
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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