God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
We got so high we made milksteak
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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