That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize