I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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