You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
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Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
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I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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