Is it because I queefed?
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize