just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
