Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(865): View more from Tennessee

he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.

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(209): View more from California

I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig

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These 23 People Are Living Shocking Lies
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(314): View more from Missouri

I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.

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(916): View more from California

No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.

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(760): View more from California

He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?

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(573): View more from Missouri

Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..

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(330): View more from Ohio

Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate

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