Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
