I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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