I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i love accidental penises.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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