I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Randomize
