We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
