I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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