btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Randomize
