omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
