you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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