Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize