piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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