Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Randomize
