guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Randomize