So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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