I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
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